I never thought this would happen

January 20, 2009

Today is the day. That dangerous dork “W” is no longer running this once great country. Finally we have elected a new leader that I believe can make smart decisions that will turn a corner toward better things.

Yet, today, I could almost care less. My heart is anchored to my toes. My son is sad. He is sad and nervous about having to have braces on his teeth and an appliance in his mouth for 3 1/2 years. He and I are both sad about losing a dog we have loved for 14 years. He is having trouble sleeping lately. Last night I laid down with him and his nine year old heart was racing like mine does when I am on the hot seat in a meeting at work scared to death. He asks me why the boys across the street never want to play with him anymore. He burst into tears on the way to school this very morning because he forgot his math homework. What has happened?

Life is so serious for both of us lately. I went in and talked to his teacher and told her everything going on in his life, the braces, the dog, the insomnia, the forgotten homework. He needs some empathy. And I am tired too. I am not sure I am the type of person, a strong enough person to know what to say and how to act to help him through difficult times. I have said more than once that I feel like we are E.T. and Elliott feeling what the other feels – and how is that helpful? E.T. eventually broke free and left Elliott and I know Griffin will do that too.

In the mean time, my heart hurts when his face is sad. I don’t know how my parents did it. They were tough. They would say “Quit your belly achin’.” and walk away. Leaving me in my room to figure it out myself. Why can’t I do that? SHOULD I do that? I really don’t know.

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